Dec
Posted on 8th December 2009
Pantera and Damageplan guitarist Dimebag Darrell was blown away on stage by some nutjob with a gun five years ago. Dimebag was an awesome musician and a badass shredder. I even met him once. He was a super nice dude. I wish he were still alive and rocking and I wish it weren’t so easy for some nutjob to just blow someone away with a gun.
Dec
Posted on 8th December 2009
I’ve just returned from my corner deli where once again, against all odds, I happened upon another cat who was shopping. As many of you who have been following my career from the very beginning are well aware, this isn’t the first time I have witnessed this sort of thing. Here’s how it all went down:
I walked into the deli, past the register, and straight back to the rear of the store where they keep the crackers (NOTE: I went to this section because I wanted to buy crackers). Anyway, it is at this point that I spotted this young cat, maybe even young enough to be considered a kitten (I don’t know- I’m not a doctor!), shopping in the same deli I was shopping in. I thought the cat seemed a little young to be out shopping by himself (NOTE: It wasn’t easy, but I did manage to get gender confirmation. My hands have mostly stopped bleeding as of this writing. Vision seems to be returning in my right eye despite some remaining blurriness), but whatever- this is New York City and despite this town losing a lot of its moxie over the past decade or two, it’s still pretty much an “anything goes” kind of place, the kind of place where an underage cat might just so happen to step out on his own to pick up a couple things at the store and you ain’t gonna say a goddamn thing about it.
As far as what this particular cat was shopping for, I remain uncertain. For a moment, he seemed kind of into the potato chips, as- duh- all cats are. But then as soon as I was sure he was going to go for a bag, he became really distracted with something on his foot and started licking it over and over and over again like it was some sort of fucking contest. Then he spotted something on the floor and just started hopping around and swatting at it for no apparent reason. Honestly, if I didn’t know any better I would have sworn this cat was drunk. And it was barely past noon!
After the cat finished swatting at something that didn’t appear to actually be there, he stopped to look at me for a second with a big “What the fuck you lookin’ at, you bag of dicks?!” kind of look on his face. This went on for roughly fifteen seconds but possibly longer. Then he darted off toward the cash register and cut in front of pretty much every person in line like some sort of drunken asshole. I love animals and all, but seriously this was a dick move. I wasn’t the only one pissed off about it either. This one guy was getting a sandwich and when the cat ran through his feet, he was all like “What the F?!” He never saw it coming. Another guy yelled something at the cat in Mexican. True to form, the cat didn’t really seem to give a shit and just kept making his way toward the register like he owned the place (NOTE: HE doesn’t. Some Greek family does. I checked).
Once the cat finally got to the register, he all of a sudden couldn’t seem to remember why he wanted to be at the cash register in the first place and just sat there staring off into space for a second before turning around and then heading straight for a pack of Pepperidge Farm soft batch cookies, which- for the record- are disgusting, a few feet away. The cat then swatted at the cookies a couple times before sprinting back toward the rear of the store in the direction of the cleansers and trash bags, items that I would be stunned if this particular cat had any use for since he appeared to be a total scumbag with no respect for himself or his surroundings.
As far as cats who shop go, this one was pretty much the craziest I have ever seen. I’m not even sure he had any money on him. For all I know, he could still be back at the store right now, being drunk, cutting in line, and acting like a dick in general. Whatever- it’s not my problem, but boy do I hope to hell that I am wrong.
Dec
Posted on 7th December 2009
Walter Schreifels (Full Set) from hate5six productions on Vimeo.
Hi. Remember how in the last post I was talking about how I was going to play in Philadelphia this past Friday night as part of the Walter Schreifels Band? Well, now you can watch a video of the entire show above. The camera was on my side of the stage all night, so it’s almost like you are totally standing two feet away from me the whole time. How lucky for you. It was pretty cold at Media Bureau Studios, the place we played at, so I was having some crazy tuning issues at various points in the show, but other than that I was doing my best to shoot flames. The show was really fun. ?uestlove from the Roots was there. He left before we went on, but I’m sure in the years to come I will choose to remember the night as that one night ?uestlove stayed for our show and ended up standing right in front of me throughout our set. It is going to be a revisionist history that takes place in my brain (as most revisionist histories tend to do). The Walter Schreifels Band, including me, will be playing tomorrow, Monday, December 7th at the Bowery Ballroom here in New York City. We are going to play all the hits and it will be tons of fun. I can feel it. Afterwards, maybe I’ll get a snack or something. I wouldn’t put it past myself.
Dec
Posted on 2nd December 2009
As many of you know, I am one of the greatest guitar players of all-time. And in keeping with this, I will be playing guitar as I often do as part of the Walter Schreifels Band this Friday, December 4th in Philadelphia. We are playing with Chuck Treece’s band McRad and some other cool bands too. It’s gonna an excellent time and you should totally come if you live in those parts. After the show, we could hang out and make light chitchat and whatnot. I am really looking forward to all the good times we will be having together. Details are here.
Dec
Posted on 2nd December 2009
Because I am an incredible actor and stuff, I recently made an appearance in an excellent new web series I like to call “All’s Faire”, which- as it turns out- is actually what it’s called. As hinted at in the title, it is about Renaissance fairs and stuff like that and also so much more. I am in Episode 3 above and I think probably the next episode after that. You can watch the whole series right here. I hope you enjoy it a whole bunch.
